Do Better: Donald "The Dinosaur" Sterling Fucking Up

There's enough people re-hashing everything the Clippers owner said on the tape that now has people of all races requesting his dismissal as the team's owner. Everyone has re-hashed how deplorable his bigoted, racist, sexist antics have been. So I won't bother you with that again. I'll tell you simply the different ways that he just royally fucked up. I'll pull in a dark-skinned Black man, actor Bill Dukes, to help me make my point:

The secret's out:  We know he's not alone in his mind state sadly. He's from an era when rich white men could look down on, exploit, and mistreat minorities, women, or the poor without anyone thinking twice of it. He's paid his way out of having to fess up many times before; this time he got set up and caught. At least the other old bigots and racists learn to dust their tracks.

• Worse possible timing: He's been the laughing stock of the league for years and his franchise was branded undesirable to go to. They had just started making ground shedding his reputation as an cheap, out-of-touch, racist, sexist bastard because his team is now a legit title contender and a trendy destination. And the Lakers are in a downturn, so the opportunity is there. Now he's on the verge of being abandoned by his fans, coaches, and players.
• His dick got him in trouble: Yep, even at 80. Sterling's lawyer claimed that the woman who released the tape, his half-Black, half-Mexican mistress V. Stiviano, was trying to get him back for the lawsuit his family had against her. Well, SHE GOT HIS ASS. She pressed "record" and provoked him and he fell in the trap quickly.
• Forgot where he came from: He grew up poor and working with lower to lower middle class people in law. Now he's rich and maintains such feelings thinking that his money makes him bulletproof. Rich ppl cut ties with rich ppl who are "bad for business" quickly. You may have made yourself a lepper professionally.
• Using slave master language: His language about how he gives his players food, houses, and cars sounded much like how I'd imagine a slave master would highlight that his actions are justified by the food and shelter he provided the free labor on his plantation. Like I can only associate with the Black people I'm exploiting for money, noone else. I can only guess who Chris Paul felt hearing that.
• And most importantly...
• Wrong sport, wrong place, wrong time: You decided to buy an NBA team (the least white of the major sports leagues), which he moved from San Diego to Los Angeles (one of the most multi-cultural cities in the world). In 2014, you're trying to make ur multi-cultural girlfriend stop associating with basketball royalty like Magic Johnson? WTF? If you bought a hockey team and moved it to Idaho, you might not have these problems.

It's 2014 and the world has changed a great deal since the heyday of the mindset Sterling has illustrated to the world this week. Especially if he wants to keep young girlfriends who grew up in a more progressive world. The commissioner can't just snatch his team from him, but they need to find a way to add pressure or have a vote to get him out. Sponsors are leaving, fans are leaving, players and coaches may leave when their chance comes and he's turned a city against him that he was just starting to see slant his direction over the Lakers. Now ppl are waiting for you to be removed from his position whether by force, sale, or his death (sad but true). Take a bow you dinosaur, you've made quite a bed for yourself this time. I hope you're faced to sell it to Magic Johnson of all people and he spits in ur face right after the contract is signed. Do Better...

Stop Me When I Start Lying: Sexism and Sports, London 2012

I'm still catching up on articles I missed while on hiatus. One topic that I have to touch on is the blatant examples of sports sexism shown during the Olympics. In case anyone forgot, the mass media is controlled by men...more specifically middle aged to old white men in corporate America. Although America is more progressive in terms of women's rights and privileges than any other place in the world, sports are still seem as masculine and more appropriate for women than men. This has somewhat manifested itself throughout the world, including the United States; take a moment and think of how many females you've heard say that women look like men when they start looking athletic. One consequence of this the perception that despite playing sports (a vigorous physical activity), they still need to look uber feminine while they do it. Part of me honestly thinks (well, actually knows) that those corporate fat cats I spoke about have a little bit of "dirty old man" to them. To them, men's sports are about who is the best performer or the most entertaining. For women, they're looking for the right combination of "Oh, she's pretty good" and "She's hot, I'll like to spend all night giving her an 'interview' at my hotel." For instance, in the little known sport of women's basketball, more people know balling beauties like Skylar Diggins (still in college) than Tina Charles (Olympic gold medalist) and Lauren Jackson (multiple time WNBA MVP) who are likely perceived as "butch". Even women who wear their hair in more appealing ways than the standard, "I'm working my ass off" ponytail gain notoriety, especially among male viewers. Hence, the 2012 tales of Lolo Jones and Gabby Douglas:

Lolo Jones

Lolo Jones (pictured left) is bad, super bad, somewhat exotic bad; for those who can't decifer the slang I just used, Lolo has undeniable beauty that transcends races. Those old corporate white men would probably get a stiffy (if they've taken their purple pills) just watching her stretch before practice in her tights. She's also a self-proclaimed virgin (she's 30) who can't seem to find a guy who will take her seriously without getting into her pants; Oh those pigs. She also happens to be a very good 100 meter hurdler who can't seem to put it together in the big meets; she's dominated everything except the big stages (Olympics and Outdoor World Championships). She came into the Olympics in 2008 in the best shape of her life. Unfortunately for her, she was in the lead, hit a hurdle throwing off her rhythm and ended up getting 7th. Cameras flocked to her looks of agony and disbelief and she sit on the track heartbroken over what had just happened; commentators poured out their sympathy for her unfortunate predicament. She was virtually inconsolable during her interviews. By the way, American Dawn Harper (pictured below right) was crowned Olympic champion in that race. In the years between, particularly the building for the 2012 Games, this put those responsible for the media, endorsements, and Olympic propaganda at a cross roads. Track is not a sport that can have many icons (like football, basketball, or others), particularly not two women. Thus, they are faced with an ultimatum who they want to make the female face of American Track & Field: the only American woman to win individual gold in 2008, Dawn Harper, or Lolo Jones, the hottie whom tragic befell in 2008? The champion seems like the easy choice. She rose to the top of the sport despite rocky and unenviable upbringing, like Lolo and others, did and won the Olympics. She won the 2012 Olympic trials, with Jones getting the 3rd and final spot. To the champion should go the spoils, right? Wrong. The word "hottie" would become the determining factor to those corporate decision makers; it's not quite a synonym to the word 'marketable' but it's getting close for women. Dawn Harper isn't some ugly chick or anything and she runs track, so you know she can fill out a dress or uniform. But she's very dark skinned and is not as naturally beautiful as Lolo. That's not an issue for me, but I'm not an older white guy. They don't provoke that stiffy for them the way Lolo does. Lolo Jones is mixed and passes the paper bag test (being lighter than a brown paper bag) which is about where pretty much any race still find Blacks or mixed women attractive (see: Halle Berry, Rihanna, Stacy Dash, Beyonce, etc); White, Latinos, Asians, etc aren't gonna flock so quickly to someone Harper's complexion. Even the

whitest of middle aged white women would call Lolo gorgeous if she was their sons' girlfriend. To make the decision easier for them, Lolo has posed tastefully nude (see pictured at bottom) and revealed the story of her virginity and struggle to find a man who accepts her lifestyle. Now in addition to her looks, she has a combination of sex appeal and innocence/purity that could feed that marketability. So, done deal. Thus she was EVERYWHERE (commercials, magazines, posters, billboards, talk show interviews, etc) for everyone to see while Harper remained largely unknown to the non-track community despite her success in 2008. Then in the 2012 Games, Harper gets a narrow silver, becoming the 8th fastest woman ever and only losing to a woman who broke the Olympic record. Lolo misses the medal stand, getting 4th, no fall, no drama, no sympathetic fan base. Then when provoked in an interview, Harper did what she had resisted doing for 4 straight years, got her feelings about the media decision off of her chest. She felt that despite being one of the more accomplished women ever in her event now, her success and her story had been overlooked for Lolo Jones's, more because of her looks and personal life than her accomplishments. Was it Lolo's fault? Absolutely not. Do I blame Lolo for not saying, "thanks for the offer, but you should have called Dawn instead"? Absolutely not. But does any of that change how Harper feels about it? Absolutely not. Track isn't a sport of massive salaries, you can be a successful track athlete on the track and still not be abnormally wealthy unless you have endorsements. So Harper sees the chick she's beaten at the Olympics and World Championships eating better than her and didn't like it. The media simultaneously highlighted the undeniable legitimacy of the bitterness while calling it a bad PR move for Harper (and bronze medalist Kellie Wells) to demonize her teammate. But hell, if winning the Olympics in 08 wasn't a good enough PR move to get Harper to fame and fortune, what is? Therefore, what does she have to lose getting it off her chest. Heart broken Lolo doesn't understand because the endorsements are nice but she wants the medal that Harper has. She never meant to spite anyone, she wanted to run track and live good understandably. That media spotlight is a bitch, ain't it?




Gabby Douglas

Gabrielle Douglas, the 16 year old sweetheart gymnast from Virginia Beach makes it to the Olympics and wins two gold medals. Her mother, who's sacrificed and scraped together money to get Gabby into some Olympic school in Iowa, is there at the Games to see her sacrifice all worth it as her daughter succeeds on the biggest stage. But all anyone has to talk about is her hair? See the foolishness to the left as an example of the foolishness that popped up online. The sexism comes into play here because (just like the successful basketball players we mentioned earlier who don't get as much attention), you being great at your sport isn't good enough in women's sports; you have to be good and you have to look the way they want you to look. If somebody likes their women with their hair down, long and flowing (you've seen all the teen movies where the girl is ridiculed for being geeky and ugly until she takes off her glasses and magically is the most beautiful girl in school all of a sudden), then that's how they want women to look while competing too. This isn't very practical in the world of sport. Unless your sweat glands are as blocked as Rush Limbaugh's arteries, you're going to sweat if you're strenuously competing. Furthermore, long hair, if not pulled back or put up, will inevitably get in your face while you try to compete. If you're a gymnast (making running, flipping, spinning, and jumping part of your competition), it's especially important to keep that mess under control. In the midst of her two gold medals, Twitter lit up with people mocking the greased back pony tail with many hair clips that the girl wore while winning two gold medals for America. Had I been on Twitter (you can check on old article citing reason why I decided against it), I would've made it my mission to ridicule everyone trying to ridicule her. Stuff like "You haven't done anything strenuous enough to sweat out your hair since the Clinton administration, I don't expect you to understand" or "Oh, I'm sorry, remind me again: What did you hair look like the last time you made history?" all over the place. To an extent I get some criticism for the straight hair populations, because they just don't understand. Black hair changes texture and volume when wet, so all those clips and that grease was needed to keep it under wraps when you're competing everyday. Plus, she now lives in an environment where she's the only Black girl at the gymnastics facility where she lives and was the only one on the Olympic team. Who understands her hair enough to do it for her while they're at competitions? Nobody she's traveling with. So while to an extent, I get why they don't understand, I think they should stop sweating the petty shit and appreciate her successes for her country. If the history of her sport serves as reference, even at 16 years old, this may be her last Olympic games (08 Olympic heroes Nastia Luikin and Shawn Johnson failed to make the 2012 team at ages 22 and 20). But to the Black community that was insulting the girl, your actions are deplorable and indefensible. Beyond the fact that she's the first Black woman to win the All Around gold medal, one of the two she won, SHE'S 16. While you were sitting at home getting fatter, you decided it was a good idea to attack a 16 year old in the midst of competition. You're scared to work out too hard or get freaky in the middle of the week because you don't want to ruin the $60 you spent at the salon getting your hair done, but you can't empathize with a Black girl trying to keep her hair as 'harnessed' as possible until the Games are over. If she showed up on the talk show circuit with her hair looking crazy, I'd understand. But she didn't, the competition was over and she got it done (see pictured below). So until one of you salt-throwing motha fuckas shows me how to make it throw Olympic competition without sweating enough to ruin a prom-like hairdo, politely shut the fuck up and recognize someone for what they do. Even though it was both women and men criticizing, it's sexist because it doesn't apply the same to men. Joakim Noah isn't badgered as badly as Gabby was and he looks like he doesn't even shower, much less worry about anything other that putting up his hair up. On a good day, he looks like Sideshow Bob from "the Simpsons". But it doesn't matter cuz he's a guy and we get over it. Stop Me When I Start Lying...

P.S. I saw that immediately after Gabby got her gold medal, NBC ran a commercial with a monkey doing gymnastics too and I didn't appreciate that covert racist shit neither. But that's a story for another day.

Are u Serious: Modern Savage Middle East Sexism

This medieval style punishment that is still allowed in the Middle East towards women must stop. I remember a few years back, Obama and other prominent world figures had to step in and stop one country from putting a lady accused of cheating (with no evidence of course) to death by stoning; that's right, the members of her community were going to bury her up to her shoulders in the ground, line up and pelt her with stones until she was dead...in the 21st century. Furthermore, I saw a documentary years ago where if a woman in her village is accused of cheating, a red hot pot is used to judge if she is lying or not. Basically, once the cast iron pot is red hot, they will touch it to her tongue 3 times. If her tongue burns, she's a lying cheater and will be stoned. If the tongue doesn't burn, she told the truth and will be permitted to live. Fuck the evidence, fuck trying to figure out if there was a time where both ppl were unaccounted for or anything like that. It's like in pick-up basketball, when there is an argument on a call and someone says "Shoot for it, the ball never lies." Whether or not you fouled me, if I'm a lights out shooter, I'm gonna make the shot; if I can't shoot, I probably won't. Now you're applying the same concept with a burning hot object and a human life at stake. I don't used such words lightly: but it's barbaric. By the way, I don't think anything more than a fine would have been asked of the other man even if she was deemed guilty and stoned. More recently, the past few days on Al Jazeera Online (the most respected of the Middle Eastern international news sources), there has been a lot of coverage on what gone on both positively and negatively for women in Saudi Arabia. They are on the cusp of gaining the right to vote and run for public office for the first time in the history of the country. But at the same time, a woman was in court facing indictment for driving, which women have been banned from doing in the country. What was her punishment for such an offense? 10 lashes with a whip. R u fucking seriuous??? They used to do that shit to slaves trying to escape. I haven't seen that shit since Will Turner was getting whipped on the 2nd "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie. This is Saudi Arabia, the world's largest and most profitable supplier of petroleum and crude oil; they should be a role model for the rest of the region. But instead they have a situation where women can now possibly be elected to Parliament but are forbidden from driving themselves to work at the country's most powerful governing body. If they break the rules, even an elected female official will be forced to remove their burqa (be reminded, the average women there has everything except their eyes covered due to the men's fear that even uncovering the rest of her face will garner unnecessary attention from other men; which they will blame on her and not the other men) and receive 10 lashes by the whip to getting behind the wheel of a car; which teenage females are permitted to do in most of the world. This isn't just some form of vigilante justice, a judge - most likely, a man who went to law school and did time as a lawyer before being elected as judge - made this ruling in a formal court hearing. As much as they like to blame Islam, I live in a Muslim country right now and it is not like that. Just because something is tradition and has been for hundreds of years, doesn't mean it is right. The world is changing and evolving, their behavior towards the mothers and daughter of our future should be doing the same.

Stop Me When I Start Lying: Sexism VS. Gender Understanding

In this first Stop Me If I Start Lying of the year 2010, I'd like to explore some of my views on gender traits and relations. This is often dangerous territory becuz it leads to the perception that u are a sexist for bringing these trends up. However, even when they start pulling out the word sexist, I rarely hear anybody justifiably disagree with me on the ideas that I highlight. I love women and they're irreplaceable.
DISCLAIMER: Before reading any further, please know that just as all generalizations do, these traits do not apply to every woman, it's just an popular topic I've seen evidence of in my dealing with women. Men have their share of issues too and I don't deny that; however, I've learned how to deal and function around and within them more than I have so far with the female gender.

• It's 2010 and a lot of women argue that they're no longer restricted to gender roles, men and women are now equal, and they don't need no man. However, I tend to find this only applies at their convenience, men are still expected to buy a drink just for the "privilege" of talking to some chick u don't even know (and in her eyes, any friends she brought too), on any casual date it is expected that he will pay (not meaning women paying doesn't happen, but that women paying is still very much a luxury and it's often a victory if she's cool with a split bill). It seems at times as if they believe their money is more valuable than a man's. I've even heard women cite guys they know that are strictly platonic friends who they call only when they want to go out somewhere but not want to spend any of their money and they know he'll pick it up. Men who don't embody the traditional gender role of being a working provider are often ridiculed. I don't think I know a guy who haven't run themselves broke at some point to make sure his lady has a good time; i dunno how many ladies I know who would have done the same.
• I'm not and most likely never will be a huge women's basketball fan. No offense, but I watch sports to marvel at what the athletes can do. I need to see people getting dunked on, catching alley oops, and things of this nature to stay excited. I get called racist when I say this but women don't attend women's bball nearly as much as men's bball either.
  
• I'm very independent and solution-oriented, I was raised that way and that isn't gonna change. It became a character trait that I admire; someone who wants a man rather than just needing one. I don't usually ask for things, that is often my last resort if finding my own answer or solution proves unsuccessful or irrational. I've met women who are the opposite, they'd rather ask than get their hands dirty or make changes to their tough process. After a certain age, reaching out to parents or ur man before attempting to find ur own solutions just ain't right. Life throws obstacles at people, adapting and finding ways to deal with them independently is part of growing up. As Kevin Hart would say "U have to be a part of ur own rescue."
• Shopping is not a hobby. Hobbies are constructive activities that build skills and may or not require money (instruments, supplies, etc). Shopping is the HABIT of spending money on urself. Much different.
• I believe that beautiful women are the most manipulative and privileged (in an everyday action sense) people on the planet. There are so many things that would fly coming from some beautiful woman that would not fly coming from some guy. I've heard women complain about not being bought drinks all night, not getting free, not being able to skip the line and get in free at crowded night spots, not being able to flirt their way out of speeding tickets, even just not getting their way every time they ask for something, and many other things becuz they're used to them. They don't get any sympathy from me becuz unless I have connections, none of those things will happen to me anyway. They take advantage of this objectification but then protest the fact that women are objectified. It's one thing if u're beautiful but u're still down to earth about things and happen to get some perks thrown ur way, that's no problem. But those who purposely flaunt things or act certain ways (flirting, sensual positioning, etc) just to take advantage shouldn't be complaining about being objectified.
• If chivalry is dead (rather than just in a reduced role), then women undoubtedly killed it. Don't complain about lack of chivalry when u don't respect nice guys anymore urself. Chivalry was started becuz it was how u won a lady over, nowadays, it's more likely so send them away, or prompt her to make u the platonic friend she calls when she wants to go out for drinks and get u to pay for them.
• It's interesting to me that both a total lack of self-esteem or an overwhelming sense of self-esteem can both create a monster of out a woman. Too much self-esteem can make a woman unapproachable (even for a regular convo rather than trying holla) and shrewd out of believing they're better than everyone around them. And lack of self-esteem (or self-esteem entirely linked to physical appearance and attention) can manifest itself a lot of different negative ways which we've all seen and I doubt I really have to explain.
• Women making up deep and intricate scenarios in their minds about something that can be explained very simply has begun to annoy me. There are things I've heard women talk about and make up some negative scenario about that I seriously doubt the guy involved even noticed. And then they look at me like I'm crazy if I tell them to fine a way to just ask the guy. I guess they prefer the scenario n rumor game over an explanation, go figure. Men aren't mind readers, talk to us when somethin like this comes up.
  
• Women cheat too, it's not all on us. Honestly, women are a lot better and more efficient at it becuz of the lack of testosterone which causes guys to do extra macho and stupid things.
• The gang mentality that goes on between a lot of women annoys me. While watchin Bad Girls Club at a friend's lady's house, she explained it to me and my friend. Like when there's an argument or something, you automatically have to take sides with ur crew despite how u actually feel about the issue. Ladies, please realize that this 'Absolutist Ultimatum' (the whole "You're either with us or against us" concept) is what every destructive or oppressive force (slave-taking colonists, corrupt bureaucracies, radical political parties, etc) has used to either force compliance or justify attack or alienation. U shouldn't have to deal with that amongst ur friends, keep that in mind. Mentally put urself in the position of both sides of the dispute and then make ur assessment.
• Relationship of not, people need friends. Oftentimes, women kind of disappear from their circle of friends in favor of him. Although I respect this commitment, I think it's too much. And it often causes her to expect him to alienate him from his friends too, which ain't always gonna happen. I feel like people need a few days a wk with their gf/bf, a few days with their friends, and a day or two to themselves. And I'll defend that balance whole heartily.
• "Oh. Well that's different." I've come to hate those words, the justification of BS double standards. If u nag at a guy about something he does when u do the exact same thing, it's not different, it's the exact same thing. Face it. It's hard but I had to learn to admit when I'm wrong about somethin, a lotta women I've met have yet to figure that out.
• Another phrase I've come to hate: "But it's just the way I am." Don't go out being critical of everyone else and wanting ppl to change if u can't deal with criticism. Everybody's shit stinks, if u're critical of ppl, be prepared to hear about urself when u step outta line too. The whole "I can't change, it's just how I am" defense ain't gonna fly.
  

U may think I sound a little sexist, but look at the points objectively and see how many of them u wholeheartedly disagree with. There are women who are exceptions to these points and I love them for that, but they often try to act like these kinds of women are myths that men made up to justify saying these kind of things; they are not. I wrote these out of real life experiences I've had or witnessed. Old gender roles create a condition where women (not all, but many times benefit more from a good relationship than men do. I think a blending of old school gender roles and new age women empowerment is what is necessary for a good, working relationship here in the 2010s. I once sat in a room full of women who all raised their hands when asked "Would u want ur husband to be a stay-at-home husband?" And to this day, I still think at least 90% were lying and wouldn't deal with that situation in reality. I feel like the relationship would b filled with arguments about how he can't make big decisions becuz he's not working and accusations about what he's doing with all his free time. I'm not signing up for that. And in light of the previously mentioned point, any questions about anything I've said should b directed to me and not a circle of female friends who will fill in assumptions for me. Please just ask me. I'll step out on a limb and say that most anyone who reads this will know ppl who fit these descriptions. Stop Me When I Start Lying...

So please, leave me a comment whether u honestly think I'm sexist or just very conscious of differences between the genders. But regardless of wut u say, I've Been Called Worse...